Love

I think the scariest thing to do in life is to fall in love.

To let go of all your inhibitions, all your fears, all your worries.

To love someone who can do no wrong in your eyes.

Senseless love,

Senseless emotion.

Those that choose to fall in love

Yes choose

Because the mere fact that you disobey your instincts telling you that breaking down all your walls can only end one way, most of the time – badly, is most definitely a choice

To all the lovers out there:

I salute you,

I applaud you.

Because what you do is brave

Very brave

Love exacts a pain unequalled on the rack.

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Caged Bird

I’ve had this one for a while now.

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There are so many feelings I’ve had bottled within me

I realise that I have to set myself free

I am like the caged bird in Maya Angelou’s story

Confined to the battles in my mind

 

You see, one can view the world so simply

However, for some reason that doesn’t come easy.

For me to understand the workings of the world

I delve into the workings of my mind

and I fixate on my version of reality and on that of society

 

My mind processes your actions and words

and translates them into what I feel they represent

And most of the time I’m right

 

I’ve realised that once you analyse the beings of the world

Your world seems to make more sense

You understand yourself and others better

 

However, you can’t truly be free…

You focus on other people rather than being your true self

You stare at your warped version of the world

Let go, let flow, let go, let flow… echoes constantly in my mind

But I guess I know that if I do that, I’ll be truly vulnerable, truly naked

I’d rather not be

 

I don’t want to be the hurt little girl at 13

Waiting for a man who calls himself her father to come home

I guess I don’t ever want to be vulnerable

But if you don’t, you can never learn, you can never grow,

In a way you remain that hurt girl at 13, who never ever matures

Not emotionally anyway

Confused?

 

Well like I said

There are so many feelings I’ve had bottled within me

I realise that I have to set myself free

Live a little, love a little, grow a little… my new motto

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Wanderless

Everyone is trying to be who they think they should be

Tryna’ fit into everyone’s perception of reality

But that is never going to bring out your true personality

Flashy cars, Tiffany rings, Louboutin shoes,

Gucci belts, Porsche cars, Brazilian weave,

Is that really who you are?

Or is that mainly who you think you ought to be.

Living your life in such a wander less fashion,

Claiming your inventive, yet, you follow the next person.

You are just a mixed up ball of confusion,

A juxtaposition, but above all,

A self – hating hypocrite

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Gem

There comes a time in life where one will have to think

A lot about their life, who they love, and everything in-between

It’s never an easy task, that they will have to face

So some pray, wish and hope, that someday, it will be okay

 

I  hate to sit and ponder on my beginning, middle and end

That is mostly because I have no idea exactly who to blame

Blame for the way I feel, as happiness is a rare gem

It seems to slip away from me each day, even though I pray it stays.

 

I hate the fact that everyone’s life seems sorted, they are as happy as can be

Maybe I should become a housewife, a lover, a woman without a conscience

Maybe my life will be complete, no strings attached, friends with benefits, the lawless kinda’  life

I laugh because you and I both know that isn’t me for a second.

 

So what does one do when they feel deflated and usurped,

Nothing much can be done, apart from laughing about life’s great treasures

Seek comfort in the fact that someone will set you free,

From the shackles that chain you to the ground so mercilessly

 

I trust one day you will understand and be free

from the burdening thoughts that plague your mind, every second of each and everyday

find someone to lend an ear to listen you all your troubles,

find someone to help you realise that no matter what,  you are still so very special to Him.

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Jigsaw

I’m tired of saying the same old thing to the same people every damn time
It’s like it goes through one ear and out the other.
Is it so hard for people to understand you, to comply with your words?
We live in world that even though we think we have choices, we really have none
We have to be friends with certain people.
Because without friends, you never really learn life’s lessons
Without friends, you never get to go to sleepovers, or birthday parties
All trivial, but yet so important!
We concern ourselves, with surrounding ourselves with amazing people
The smarty’s who make us smart
The popular kids who invite us to all the shindigs
The Afrocentric peeps,’ cause we want to remember a little piece of home
The gang, the unit.
The boys, the girls.
Our people,
Your person.
Why?
Because those people are your friends
Or so you think.
In a little while, you’ll be ostracised, put aside,
Left to crumble and cry.
Why? So you can learn a lesson, remember who is boss.
The fact is, without you, they will be nothing…
Without you,
What they think is perfect, becomes a single shade of an opaque glass
Left in the rain, with raindrops covering it.
In the cold, in the snow.
With no one,
Alone.
To all the people that have ever been victimised: this is for you
Pick up all the pieces to the puzzle they have created,
Put it all back together,
And take solace in the fact that they make your life hell when they themselves are living in a mixed up conundrum.

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I

I want to be loved

I want to be held

I want you to hold me.

Hold me tight, hold me close, never let go

If you let go of me, I’ll fly away

Away from this place

A place unknown to you

You will ask around, ask to hear my voice again

But once again, I’ll be away, away from you

All I need is for you to be honest with me

And tell me, “Baby, I’m in love with you.”

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